HNT #17 - Cheap Wine & A Three Day Growth.

Once I smoked a Danneman cigar
Drove a foreign car
Baby that was years ago
I left it all behind
Had a friend, I heard she died
On a needle she was crucified
Baby that was years ago
I left it all behind for my
Cheap wine and a three day growth
Cheap wine and a three day growth
Come-on, come-on, come-on

Don Walker (Cold Chisel)

This my attempt at being cool. Drinking cheap wine with a 3 day growth. I don't know that it works that well, but the wine was quite nice.

For more HNT fun, pay a visit to Os.

Wednesday Weirdness #14

Wednesday Weirdness has a mixed bag of fun questions for discussion this week. If you want to check out this weirdness then click HERE.

1. Is there anything hanging from your vehicle's rear view mirror?
Absolutely nothing. Maybe I am boring, but I find things that dangle from the mirror to be really distracting. Perhaps I would get used to them if I left them there long enough. Yeah, perhaps, but they bug me so much that I just have to take them down.

2. When you go into the bathroom, do you ever check behind the shower curtain? You know, to make sure no one is miraculously hiding back there.
I don't for two reasons. First is that I have never really thought about people hiding there, waiting to get me, and secondly is that I don't have a shower curtain at home, only a sliding glass door. However, it doesn't bother me when I stay in hotels, etc that do have shower curtains. I remember that things like that used to freak my sister out and she always had to check the wardrobe and under the bed before she could sleep at night. I don't know whether she still does.

3. At what age did your mom or dad give you "the talk" about sex?
I don't recall ever getting "the talk" from my parents. It was covered at high school in about year 9, and other than that I think most of my sex education came from play ground discussion, magazines such as Playboy & Penthouse, and eventually experimentation. I do like that 'hands-on' learning.

4. If you could add anything at all to an airplane to make trips more interesting, what would it be and why?
I have travelled quite a bit by plane and I always have problems with a lack of leg room. Because I am over 6 foot tall I find that my knees are pressed against the seat in front and I can never stretch out or even get my legs into a comfortable position. So I would like seats that are more comfortable with extra leg room for us tall folk. Maybe then I would arrive at my destination feeling fresher from a bit more sleep and without a sore back and cramped legs.

5. What is one thing you and your significant other can never seem to agree on?
Sex. I want it, she doesn't and I don't get to win this one very often.

6. Have you ever walked in on someone else having sex? How did you and the people involved react?
I don't think I ever have. I did walk in on my parents once when they were just having 'a kiss and a cuddle' in bed and didn't think too much of it at the time, but later on I realise that they may have been just about to get 'down to it', or had just finished. Either way, the thought of one's parents having sex is not something that should be considered for too long, or in too much detail. And I'll leave it there.

7. Everyone hears discussions that they consider boring. What is one topic that can put you to sleep quicker than any other?
New Mums talking about their 'new bundles of joy'. I have been guilty of it when I was a new Dad but I am sure that I didn't drone on about nappy rash, or the contents of a nappy, or the consistency of every bowel movement. It seems that just lately, every friend who has a new baby wants to provide me with all the details of every minute of the darling's life. Do I look that interested, cos I'm not!!
(apologies to any new Mums who might read this. I'm sure you and your baby are the exception)

TMI Tuesday #37

TMI Tuesday has an eclectic bunch of questions this week. If you would like to join the fun then click HERE.

1. What is your favorite song to have sex to?
I don't have one. Sex with Mrs A. takes place late at night, under the cover of darkness and is extremely quiet so as not to wake the kids. Music does not factor into this equation. I can't even remember any favourite songs from my younger days, although I have always want to have sex to side 1 of Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon. To me that sounded like the perfect soundtrack for passion, ending with The Great Gig In The Sky with it's almost orgasmic wailing.

2. What is your vision of hell?
Depression. I have suffered from it in the past and it really is a living hell. Thankfully those dark days are well and truly behind me now.

3. In the film made of your life, who will play you?
I've answered this one before somewhere and I still go with my original answer of Kevin Costner, an under rated yet thoroughly competent actor whom I really respect.

4. What is the one thing you most urgently need to tell your mom?
My mother is no longer with us, but I would like to say good bye to her and tell her that I miss her. She died while travelling so she didn't have family or friends with her when she went and that is something that can be hard for me to handle at times.

5. What will be carved onto your tombstone?
I always liked Spike Milligan's epitaph of 'See, I really was sick', but if I had to come up with my own then how about "Are we there, yet?", or "Is this it?".

And the bonus: What is your drag name (which would be, first name: the name of your first pet; last name: the name of the street you grew up on)?
Twinkle Seymour. In the phone book it would be listed as Seymour Twinkle and I think I like that better.

HNT #16 - Roses on Piano.

Was it somethin' I said or somethin' I did
Did my words not come out right
Tho' I tried not to hurt you
Tho' I tried
But I guess that's why they say
Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings a sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn

Bret Michaels, Bobby Dall, Rikki Rocket, C.C. DeVille (Poison)

Today's lyrics suit the way I am feeling and also go nicely with the picture I have featured. I wanted something about roses and/or pianos, and these will do just fine. Which brings me to this week's theme. It's an old line but it fitted perfectly with the prop that I had on hand this week. Here goes;

What is better than roses on your piano? (click to find out)

For more HNT fun, go pay Os a visit.

(the answer is Tulips (two lips) on your organ)

Wednesday Weirdness #13 - The Ex Files

I am not feeling very inspired today due to the miserable day that I am having, but I will play along because that is what I usually do on a Wednesday. If you would like to play along then click HERE.

1. When your relationships end, are you the instigator of the breakup or the recipient?
I guess it depends on the circumstances, and thinking back over past relationships it has probably been 50/50.

2. Do you save things from your ex, or get rid of them? If you save them, how? If you trash them, how?
I tend to save things. Not in a spooky, stalker type of way, but in an 'I just never got around to throwing them out' way. They usually accumulate in a box in the garage and every now and again I come across them during a clean up. Some of them hold fond memories so they just end up back in the box till the next clean up.

3. Describe your favorite ex?
I don't think I really have a favourite. They are all just exes with their good and bad points.

4. Do you consider a friend's ex off limits?
Not at all. If their relationship is finished then I am not treading on any one's toes. If there is something between us then why shouldn't we explore it?

5. Have you ever had sex with an ex? Why?
I don't recall a specific occasion, but I am not opposed to the idea. It all depends on time, place, and circumstance.

6. If you had a choice between spending the rest of your life with your worst ex-boyfriend, or your HS Nemesis, who would you choose?
I don't have an ex-boyfriend or a HS nemesis. If I did I would probably choose the ex because we at least shared some common interests once upon a time and it would not be beyond the realms of possibility that we could co-exist together again. With a nemesis, they would automatically be opposed to co-existence because that is the nature of a nemesis.

7. Would you ever create a YouTube video or a website celebrating your exes' flaws?
I couldn't be bothered to find the time or inclination to do such a thing. I don't hold grudges so I would be quite happy to let them go off and live their life the way they see fit.

TMI Tuesday #36 - Romance Edition

TMI Tuesday turns it's focus onto romance this week and what perfect timing. I sense love in the air and I feel in the mood for a little romance. If you want to join this fun then just click HERE.

1. What is your definition of romantic?
It might sound obvious, but to me, romantic is putting the romance into a relationship. That means doing the special little things that make the other person feel wanted, needed and loved. It can be anything from flowers and chocolates, to little notes and cards, a knowing look or smile at an appropriate time, and especially remembering significant dates or anniversaries.

2. Would you consider yourself to be romantic?
Yes, I would consider myself to be a romantic. I like to spoil the love of my life and I like to make a point of remembering birthdays and anniversaries. I don't go over the top, but I think little gestures made frequently are much better than grand statements made once in a while, although grand statements have their place.

3. Is your significant other romantic?
Yes, Mrs A. is moderately romantic. She appreciates my efforts and has her romantic moments in return. It is just a pity that her romance doesn't extend to the bedroom. Romantic actions there are seen as a crude attempt to "score" and are treated as such.

4. Have you ever chastised a SO for not being romantic enough or too romantic?
No, I can't say that I have. I have discussed bedroom romance with Mrs A. but all my efforts fall on deaf ears and she refuses to change because she sees nothing wrong.

5. What do you consider a grand romantic gesture? Have you ever been the recipient or giver of one?
A grand romantic gesture would be something like booking a special surprise getaway for just the 2 of you so you could enjoy each other's company without interference from the outside world. I haven't been the recipient of such a gesture but I did take Mrs A. on just such a weekend when we were still newly engaged. A good time was had by all.

6. If you have done something romantic to get laid, did it work? If not, why and how did that affect your romantic tendencies in the past.
I remember back to my younger days, there was this one girl that I wanted to go out with but she played hard to get and we would only ever end up going out in a group. I plucked up enough courage to give her a bunch of roses and asked if she would accompany me to the drive-in to see a movie that we both wanted to see. She agreed to, and in the car that night at the drive-in I had packed some chilled bubbly (only cheap sparkling wine) and two champagne flutes. We sat and watched the movie while sipping 'champagne'. I didn't get laid that night as it was only our first date (and I didn't want her to think that I had just tried to get her drunk to sleep with me) but she did become my girlfriend and we had a relationship that lasted 18 months or more, so I think the ends justified the means.

7. What is the most romantic thing you have ever done? Had done for you?
The answers to the above 2 questions would be some of the most romantic things that I have done. As I said previously, I don't really go for grand gestures but prefer little and often. When I think of romantic things the chorus from a Melissa Etheridge song (I Want To Be In Love) comes to mind.

In front of total strangers won't you kiss me
Flowers for no reason but you miss me
Oh I want to be in love
You're standing on the doorstep in the rain
Cause you couldn't wait to see me once again
Oh I want to be in love...
On Tuesday light the candles bring me wine
Wednesday morning I won't get to work on time
Oh I want to be in love
Surprise me as I'm stepping off the plane
Take my hand as they play our song again
Oh I want to be in love

As for romantic things done for me, my mind has gone blank and I can't really think of anything right at the moment.

For The Love Of It.

This morning, while I joined the other hamsters on the treadmills at my gym, I caught a snippet of a segment from one of the local morning TV programs. While I couldn't hear what was being said, I could see from the captions and information displayed on the screen that they were talking about infidelity, a subject that is close to my heart. One of the statistics that was screened was very interesting to me. It claimed that 80% of women having affairs do so to meet emotional and/or psychological needs, while 80% of men having affairs are only interested in satisfying sexual and/or physical desires. This got me wondering.

Are women looking for an emotional connection with the men they choose to have affairs with? Are they looking for validation that they don't get from their husbands? Is the sex just a way to get a man to love them, or replace the love that they are lacking at home? And what about men? Are we searching for the sex that we miss out on at home? Do we really not want/or need to fall in love with our mistress? Are we so callous that we will just satisfy our sexual desires without meeting the needs of our new partner? And do men who are sexual satisfied at home still have a tendency to roam?

So many questions that I don't have the answers to. I can only speak from my own experiences. When I first embarked on my adulterous affairs it was purely for sexual satisfaction. That side of my relationship with Mrs A. was sadly lacking (read non-existent) and I had physical desires that weren't being met. In other words, I fit firmly into the 80% category that was mentioned. However, I was also led to believe that the women I hooked up with were also looking for sexual satisfaction as opposed to an emotional attachment. Perhaps I read it wrong, but that is how it came across to me and they did nothing to convince me otherwise. Can it really be that I only had affairs with women from the 20% category? If so, then where were the other 80%? Or maybe the figures don't really add up? Perhaps the women surveyed were to afraid to admit that they were only seeking sex and had to justify their actions by claiming it was for more altruistic reasons?

Having said all that, I now find myself at odds with everything that I have written and previously believed. Holly, whom I met at Christmas but no longer keep in touch with, was the first woman that I had an affair with and developed genuine feelings for. It was never going to amount to anything more than a holiday romance because she lived on the other side of the world, yet she still meant more to me than just sex. Since then I have only had 1 brief liaison with a woman and that left me feeling empty and unsatisfied. I thought my wanderlust may have departed for good.

Seems that just when you stop looking, that's when you find what you need. In a complete contradiction, I have recently met a woman who is unlike any that has gone before. I am completely taken by her, and have fallen hook, line and sinker for her charms. She evokes feelings in me that I haven't felt for ages. And she has done all this on a completely intellectual and emotional level. We haven't even kissed or held hands yet! So she provides all the psychological stimulation that I crave and none of the physical desire that I thought that I did (although I would love to have my wicked way with her someday). How did this happen? I have gone from the 80% to the 20% without even realising it.

I am looking to hear from people who have had affairs and can shed some light on which percentage they fall into. Did your reasons for having the affair change after a period of time, and did you find what you were looking for? Email me if you don't want to leave a response in the comments.